In front of the mirror....
I Can't even recognize the girl inside the mirror....
"Girl..."suddenly the girl inside the mirror said...
I stared at her....
"Don't be silly... He will never know how much you love him..."She said...
"He never appreciate what you did for him..... Time expired... You have to go..."
"Go?" I confuse..."Where should I go?"
"Leave him.... Never look back..." She said in lower tone.....seems like this is an order...
"Leave him??? No!! I don't want to... " I shouted....madly...
"Time's up, sweetheart...2 months ago... You did the same thing... But you can't let go... You promise me that you will give him one more chance....And you will leave him with no doubt if same thing happened..."
"This is different!!" I shouted... louder...
"No different... Accept it... Please.... You know everything clearly.... Why you still wanna cheat yourself?" She asked...
"But I never heard his explanation!!!" I reply...
"No... that is not necessary... Explain is too late for now.... You protect so much people.. even him... Now its time to protect yourself.... Please protect your ownself!" She was bagging...me...
TO PROTECT MYSELF...
"Trust me! He will never know how sad you are! He will never want to know how is your feeling! But you too care about him! You are such a idiot!! You should be a clever girl... why you wanna act like a fool?! " She said again...... "You know the way actually.. Why you always did it in opposite way? "
"Stop it!! I act like an idiot because I love him! I protect him because I love him!! I did it all just because I love him!!" I told the girls inside the mirror... come from my heart...
"I know... But you should not forget your promise... You can't change anything within the time you promise me... So, you should keep your promise now... And Leave... Don't even try to give him or yourself any chance.... That is enough to be hurt... You will be mad or die very soon if you let this keep going on... " She change her tone... soft tone...
"..............." Don't know what can I said...
"Sweetheart... If there is a
FATE between you and him... You both will be together in the future.. no matter what happened... You both still can be together... Don't even try to force any side...He might have his reasons.. If you still love him, let him go... and let yourself go too... This is the win-win situation... And never try to guess what is his thinking now... Its no point......Take a rest... Love yourself... MORE THAN ANYONE... "
Yes, its really tired... Very TIRED....Because I have to force myself to pretend to be Alright when I face my friends or family... Don't wanna let them worry about me.... Air... freeze again...
At the same time, I can feel a hug from her... deeply... until I fall asleep inside her hug... A hug which is so trustworthy....
Day 4---
Saw some new photos of him....
He was smiling happy....
If I let him go he will be happy...
I should be happy too... Because I done a good job...
Look out from the window... I saw...
*SUNLIGHT* =) ......